A Comment on Robert Scoble's Lovemaking
Robert Scoble this morning:
... Kathy Sierra is one of the best bloggers out there. She makes love to us with every post.
It'll be interesting to see how his commenters respond. Techbloggers don't often attempt to channel Barry White. I know I'm being obnoxious, but I have to ask whether Scoble would whip out that metaphor for a male blogger of his affection.
In the name of science, please expose yourself to the following hypothetical Scobleizations and let me know which one makes you the most uncomfortable in your workplace.
... Eugene Volokh is one of the best bloggers out there. He makes love to us with every post.
... Jeff Jarvis is one of the best bloggers out there. He makes love to us with every post.
... Dave Winer is one of the best bloggers out there. He makes love to us with every post.
From my experimentation, I think this only sounds natural when you try it on a blogger with a French-sounding name:
... Loïc Le Meur is one of the best bloggers out there. He makes love to us with every post.
Comments
That Winer thing crossed some kind of line. Whoa.
I think it sounds natural when you try it with Uncle Mikey.
Mike Bolduc is one of the best bloggers out there. He makes love to us with every post.
Too Germanic.
This reminds me of group nouns :-). I can think of some fun things to fill in the blank for "_____ with every post", for certain A-listers.
While I grant your point, there's a mix of other factors too. This is after all a guy who was sloganeering about getting naked.
Humor aside for a moment, and I RARELY put humor aside... for long:
If you substitute "preaches" for "makes" [and optionally pull the "to us" phrase] it holds up very well and describes Kathy's writing as I read it. Think, Platonic vs Erotic love. That would also remove the homophobic context that makes your humor effective, if disturbing.
"... Kathy Sierra is one of the best bloggers out there. She preaches love [to us] with every post."
None of the other suggested bloggers preach "love"... they tend more towards sermons based upon hellfire and the 7 deadly sins. Maybe AKMA or
another seminary trained male would take the gender issue out of a well intended compliment.
Yes, all that is well and good, and I understand where you're coming from...
(Record scratch SFX)
TED STEVENS! TED STEVENS! Put all sectors on alert!
"Mike Bolduc is one of the best bloggers out there. He makes love to us with every post."
Bolduc isn't French?
Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew!
Laura Lemay is one of the best bloggers out there. She makes love to us with every post.
It's like the old joke: you can make any Scoble post funny by adding the words "... IN BED" at the end.
"The future of business is naked conversations... IN BED."
The Dave Wiener one sent chills down my spine. It does cross a line.
Jeff Jarvis? I can't fathom Jarvis making love to anyone. MEOW!
Volokh's is not believable because he is incapable of feeling or making any emotion.
Loic? Not Pepe Le Pew enough.
HUMOR ON
Laura Lemay is in the house!
Laura has written:
"Teach Yourself Open Heart Surgery"
"Teach Yourself Java Bytecode Programming (in Notepad or vi)"
"Teach Old Dogs New Tricks"
and
the ill fated:
"Teach Yourself Radio UserLand" **which was never published because the Cadenhead book beat her to market and saturated the market with 200 copies shipped to date
It has never been confirmed but it is highly suspected that the failure of her Radio Userland book project created a writer's block for Laura and she turned her attention over to blogging.
That and a severe case of carpal tunnel syndrome from reviewing the
book:
"How to Write a Best Selling Technical Book in 14 days"
Her advance copy had a faulty GOTO statement which led to her authoring 26 books in one year.
HUMOR OFF
I'll try one:
Rogers Cadenhead is one of the most prolific bloggers out there, a veritable Peter North of the tech world. He generously bukkakes all comers with thick, ropy strands of acronyms and obscure professional references, whereupon it all reads like Peanuts parents to techless fools like me, but even I can tell it's sexy with five capital Xs. Our cups overfloweth when Rogers' wand of coding stands at attention and gives forth the seeds of knowledge.
It's harder than it looks. And yes, that's what she said.
P.S. Apparently I'm really mature, because reading the words "Dave Weiner" makes me laugh.
Bolduc isn't French?
Mais oui. Canadien/Francais, actuellement.
However you might feel about that comment...I'm the one that's supposedly having virtual sex with y'all. Talk about "ewwww..."
And if only he knew "what I was wearing" when I posted... my ensemble begins with bunny slippers...
Hmmm, Rogers Cadenhead is one of the best bloggers out there. He makes love to us with every post!
Heheh, you make me laugh Rogers, and you did catch me with some scary metaphorical questions and imagery.
This is awful. I'm seeing Uncle Mikey, Dave Winer, AND Laura Lemay in bed together. Please help me.
That was a joke.
Forget the bunny slippers, Kathy Sierra is Southern? Now I'm turned ON.
For the good of the internet, please never write "ropy strands" again.
Thanks.
Yeah, it does sound indecent doesn't it? Even for a Texan of French Canadian descent.
"Glistening threads" just doesn't sound substantial enough for a man of Rogers' bearing. Perhaps "gloriously cascading sheets"? Or simply "love tsunami"?
I try and do something similar with every post, too, lord knows I try, but I don't think 'make love' would be the right way to express it.
Big sanks for material
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