Nude Dancer Denudes Wallet
Today's New York Times has an op-ed defending the right of strip clubs to rip off their clientele:With many customers, fawning is key. What a stripper sells is not her ability to dance or take off her clothes, but her ability to suspend the customer's disbelief.
If she is doing her job right, his bald spot and his mortgage cease to exist, and he enters an adolescent fantasy of sexual prowess, temporarily transformed into James Bond, Han Solo and Hugh Hefner all rolled into one. The dancers keep cooing and flattering until the money runs out. It's not duplicitous; it's what the patron signs up for.
The author of the essay is Elizabeth Eaves, a former stripper who has turned the experience into a work of scholarship: Bare: On Women, Dancing, Sex, and Power.
There's something poetic about a stripper who hates her customers so much she believes her job is to bankrupt them, since there isn't a lot of respect coming in the other direction of the "shake your moneymakers" business.
Eaves has an extremely low opinion of the men whose wallets she used to lay bare:
I don't have a lot of respect for these men. I don't think they're evil people, but I think that they're weak. I see visiting strip clubs as a form of cheating; I'm bothered by the idea that women are for sale, and I see this in many aspects of our society.
Comments
So, now this user complains about being used? That "women are for sale"? It seems to me that this hypocrit was reaping the benefits of her "selling herself" and now says she finds it distastfull? A prostitute is a prostitute whether selling her body or her soul.as far as "visiting a strip club,being a form of cheating",so what?
Perhaps the man is in a relationship which does not afford him the visual or physical stimulation he needs. Perhaps his wife no longer cares to engage in sex. There are many reasons for enjoying this form of entertainment. Perhaps the man is unmarried. Is that also cheating? Cheating on who? It appears that this woman has her own preconceived ideas which she applies broadly to all men. And also an obvious HATE of men as "it's the strippers job to BANKRUPT them".If this is the basis of her rag, I save my money for the next strip club!!
Rogers says, "There's something poetic about a stripper who hates her customers so much she believes her job is to bankrupt them..."
I didn't get the sense that Betty actually 'hated' these men, but more that she didn't have (as she said) much respect for them. I was more impressed by her nearly seemless writing skills than any feelings that she disliked the customers. I expect that she would have the same lack of respect for women who visited male strip clubs or bachelorette parties, and it would be an interesting interview question to pose to her.
The 'meat market,' although predominantly catering to males, is not just confined to the masculine sex because women in that situation are all seemingly into grabbing some 'meat,' too...
Her writing skills seem less than that.
One of her former customers said that she had extraordinary talents on all spheres, but that she couldn't compare to a geisha girl.
Isn't this great? All this intellectual talk makes me feel like I'm in the presence of true greatness.
She's a tramp and she hates herself for bein one....tough shit hunny. Now how about "earning" your money....get on your knees!!!!!!
Vince does go on, "Her writing skills seem less than that."
I found her 'style' very good and equal to most of those reporting the 'news.'
"One of her former customers said that she had extraordinary talents on all spheres, but that she couldn't compare to a geisha girl."
You 'know' Tim and apparently everyone else who may or may not be mentioned in the 'news!' What a fantastic life you've led; meanwhile sadly ending up responding obsessively to whatever I might write on a backwater blog...
My groupie says, "Isn't this great? All this intellectual talk makes me feel like I'm in the presence of true greatness."
I love backhanded compliments like this, My Groupie! Now, get down on your knees and open wide...
All I can say from the photo: with looks like that, no wonder she moved from stripping to writing. She has a face that was made for radio.
I can't help it if my groupie's smarter than yours.
It takes two (or three, or four) to tango, let's just make it an orgy.
By the way, what do you look like?
Vince can't stop trolling, "By the way, what do you look like?"
I'm not your type, Vinny, and as I have attempted to indicate. I'm an old, bald, potbellied guy without an iota of libido to spare for the masculine side of humanity...
The world is full of people that do distasteful work because it pays so well...
Monetizing sexual attraction is a
legitimate form of cashing in on your
essential attributes and having limited
respect for the customer is typical
of this kind of work.
Consider any sales person that hawks
a substandard product with a less than
honest sales pitch... the dynamics of
are essentially the same: "It paid some
bills and the victim got what they
asked for and I can't help but feeling
that they should have been more careful
with their money. I know I will be."
The moral judgements seem overly hars to
me... even if you never sinned...
maybe the judgements are the sin.
Who am I to judge?
And I thank you for the comment
privilege.
Caveat Emptor.
Oh, and by the way, I also hate my employer. I keep it to myself and milk this gig for all it's worth. That's the American way, right?
Look, the unconscious mind is full of hooks. We use them every day. The boss is boss partially because of an unconscious hook in our minds, for example.
Hitler used all kinds of hooks to achieve his goals of power and control. Mercy.
So, there are all kinds of sexual hooks. So, cynical usage of these hooks for profit can not be viewed as extrodinary. The cautionary message here is that we all should be aware of these unconscious hooks and guard them carefully against our unwilling control through their usage.
Bob says, "So, there are all kinds of sexual hooks. So, cynical usage of these hooks for profit can not be viewed as extrodinary. The cautionary message here is that we all should be aware of these unconscious hooks and guard them carefully against our unwilling control through their usage."
Ironically, there were periods where the woman's viewpoint counted the most. Synchronistically (can I say that?), one of those societies was in Iraq, during Sumerian control of the area (including practically all the ME of that time.) The matriarchy provided that the various women adherents to whatever god they chose would do 'public service,' at least once, as temple prostitudes, who would require whatever the traffic would bear in payment for enjoying their personal favors. Children from any simultaneously effected 'hits' would be raised as sons and daughters of the particular god; with special position in life to start it.
Now, we have a bunch of males indicating some sort of high-horse attitudes towards women who manage to gain some benefit from the masculine, repressed and stuffed-shirt need to find some macho fantasy in nude women (who, btw, don't have to take any chances on having a god's son/daughter for satisfying that 'faint hope.'
I admire women who are confident enough in themselves that they would suffer the likes of you kids and your 'eat my cake and have it too,' mealymouthed effort to dis' women whenever you can...
....how's that, Groupie?
I don't even know what to say. They misogony is just so rampant. Get a brain and some empathy - not for this woman in particular, but for humankind in general.
I'm having trouble finding the sympathetic figure in this story -- the angry stripper or the public CEO spending thousands of dollars of company money ordering lap dances in bulk.
It is not surprising that some men are angered by what she says.
"She's a tramp and she hates herself for bein one....tough shit hunny. Now how about "earning" your money....get on your knees!!!!!! "
For all of the money spent at strip joints! To think there are women there who dont respect the men who frequent the place!!!!!!!! How appalling is that?
Next someone will tell me that the girls at the Playboy Mansion realy DON'T
wash their cars in bikinis and high heels when they are at home.
The one I'm living with doesn't...
Rogers says, "I'm having trouble finding the sympathetic figure in this story -- the angry stripper or the public CEO spending thousands of dollars of company money ordering lap dances in bulk."
That you consider that she 'hates' males might be a clue. That was why I was struck by her writing skills, since it was, to me at least, so neutral as to that aspect of what she might have felt emotionally; having to pander to males in a male dominated society, and knowing that they weren't sympathetic to the 'angry stripper.'
Not that she might not feel some female chauvanism to the 'children' she had to deal with and their prurient fantasies...
...Groupie?
You know, at first I thought that Tadowe was Rogers' straight man, maybe even a paid actor to stir things up.
But then the horrible truth hit me. Tadowe's serious. He takes all this frivolity to heart, and actually seems to believe that anything anyone says here makes a damn bit of difference.
When I'm talking to Tadowe, anyone who thinks I'm serious needs to have his head examined. I think I'm allowed a little poetic license here.
Everything we need to know about Elizabeth Eaves is manifest in that photo: she's intelligent, she works out, and she can make mince meat of most men.
Which is what I think happened to Tadowe.
Vince says, "You know, at first I thought that Tadowe was Rogers' straight man, maybe even a paid actor to stir things up."
Every successful blog has cogent commentary. Rogers is lucky in that regard. And, I'm flattered by your efforts to preprejudice any further remarks I might make, Vince. I know you don't believe that, but I am.
"But then the horrible truth hit me. Tadowe's serious. He takes all this frivolity to heart, and actually seems to believe that anything anyone says here makes a damn bit of difference."
Please, Vince, just say touch next time. This constant effort to misdirect is getting tiresome.
"When I'm talking to Tadowe, anyone who thinks I'm serious needs to have his head examined. I think I'm allowed a little poetic license here."
Really, who isn't, Vince?
"Everything we need to know about Elizabeth Eaves is manifest in that photo: she's intelligent, she works out, and she can make mince meat of most men."
Et tu, Vincenzo?
"Which is what I think happened to Tadowe."
In my own, childlike prurient fantasies, Vinny...
Perhaps Rogers will grace us with a personal tale from his stripping career?
No, Tadowe, you can't say 'synchronistically', because it sounds pompous.
What you said about Sumerian matriarchy was clever, although I'd suggest you not initialize the words 'Middle East'.
That 'ME' just doesn't hit the dulcet tone.
Vinny's just a country boy, but I went to Oxford, and I won't take any BS from a pot-bellied man who needs Viagra.
Perhaps Rogers will grace us with a personal tale from his stripping career?
It wasn't a career. More of a compulsion, really. One that I have been advised by my attorney to resist as strongly as possible.
Rogers is lucky in that regard.
Indeed. But I didn't say that this former stripper hates men. I just think she hates strip club patrons.
The ubiquitous 'visitor' says, "No, Tadowe, you can't say 'synchronistically', because it sounds pompous."
Why didn't some anti-intellectual blogger tell me that before I made a pomp out of myself?
"What you said about Sumerian matriarchy was clever, although I'd suggest you not initialize the words 'Middle East'."
Pomp away, Visi.
"That 'ME' just doesn't hit the dulcet tone."
I'm sure there is someone here who will feel your pain.
"Vinny's just a country boy, but I went to Oxford, and I won't take any BS from a pot-bellied man who needs Viagra."
Watch out! Vince will correct your lack of "z's." Stick 'em in where you would normally use an "s," and you will get along with him...a bother though.
Rogers snuck one in there, "Indeed. But I didn't say that this former stripper hates men. I just think she hates strip club patrons."
Sorry, Rogers, I was extrapolating and got carried away in my generali(z)ation. Of course, you are not the chauvanistic jerk I was describing...
(i hope the oxford don won't belabor my use of that supercilious word, above...what do you think?)
Tad, you're back. I love you, man.
Here, have a beer on me, mount the stage, and deconstruct my life before God and all the world.
Go ahead, it's fun.
You realize that, don't you?
My man Vincent says, "Tad, you're back. I love you, man."
Hey! Did I call you a rube or something? I believe that was someone else. Someone who won't take any BS (however that is lacking in 'dulcet') from yours truly.
"Here, have a beer on me, mount the stage, and deconstruct my life before God and all the world."
What? Am I some Oxford pooftah who called you a 'country boy,' or what? I just said I wasn't interested in your 'orgy.'
"Go ahead, it's fun.
You realize that, don't you?"
I realize that you are some kind of obsessed with a few written words, Vince...relax and start addressing the subject(s)...
Is it just me, or is it getting hot in here?
Look, man, from your description of yourself, I won't come knocking at your door.
But I'm smoking on this peace pipe all alone. I don't believe you have a woman. Let's hear from her.
Vince goes on, "Look, man, from your description of yourself, I won't come knocking at your door."
What a relief!
"But I'm smoking on this peace pipe all alone. I don't believe you have a woman. Let's hear from her."
Look, Vince, I'm not going to be your good buddy, okay? Schmooze the don, why not?
Just as I thought.
No woman, no cry.
Vince goes on and on and on, "you didn't think i'd let all this go on without putting my two cents in, did ya?"
Pretty pathetic...
"Don't pay us, we'll pay you".
The user that calls himself "B.U.LLSHITT" is really full of it. He is justifying why men might be visiting strip joints by saying: "Perhaps the man is in a relationship which does not afford him the visual or physical stimulation he needs. Perhaps his wife no longer cares to engage in sex." Many men might be in relationships like the ones he is mentioning, however, not all of them visits strip joints because they lack stimulation from wife or girlfriend. Men who frequently visits strip joints have been found to have lower seelfesteem, pattern of previous relationship issues and communication issues. So lack of stimulation from wife or girlfriend most likely has to do with her beeing tired of her man not beeing able to communicate feelings and such and therefore looses interest in stimulating her partner.
When I read Bare it was apparent that Elizabeth Eaves had never actually worked in a real strip-club. She was upper-middle class and basically said those kinds of clubs were too far below her for her to ever actually work in one. I think she should stop appropriating that word and stop writing like she is the know-all of stripping when she actually never worked as one. Real strippers, working class women who work in strip clubs have to deal with a lot more shit than the girls do at the Lusty Lady. This difference needs to be addressed and rich white girls need to stop saying the stories that belong to marginalized women.
striptease is a business like everything else with the seller's knowledge and doing what he does best and whether you are male stripper or female stripper
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