My glasses have been downsized

The eyeglasses in my mugshot are the Clubman Art-Rim, the brand I've been wearing ever since seeing D-FENS, the downsized engineer played by Michael Douglas in Falling Down. With my haircut and haggard expression, I'm one short-sleeve dress shirt and a suitcase away from a terrific Halloween costume.

The Clubman Art-Rim were the quintessential specs for the gray-flannel suit crowd and other squares in the '50s, many of whom kept them alive for decades through stubborn resistance to change. I wouldn't be surprised if the same people married women who have steadfastly maintained beehive hairdos, decades after the hairnest passed out of style.

Today, the Art-Rim turns up in movies on uptight, by-the-book characters in desperate need of dietary fiber, like the FBI agent played by Tom Hanks in Catch Me If You Can.

I occasionally hear from other devotees of the Art-Rim, which had sales of one million back in the day, according to one appreciation. Because most of these people are jonesing to score a pair, I finally called the manufacturer today and received terrible news: the brand is being discontinued. All that's left are the brown "royal amber" frames in sizes 48 and 51, and those won't last long.

Take a look at D-FENS, Tom Hanks, and me again. Are we really a crowd you want to subject to an unexpected, troubling change?

2004/04/29 · 7 COMMENTS · Link

Comments

Indeed, Rogers, I think they need to find a way to make sure you can still get your frames. For the good of us all. :)

Doesn't Drew Carey wear them, too?

#1 · d.w. · 2004/04/30

Previosuly, I never quite figured out what it was that made me slightly nervous about you... Now I know!

#2 · Pete Prodoehl · 2004/04/30

Oh, I've always loved that style of frame. I never knew who made them though -- I've always called them "Malcolm X goes to NASA" frames.

#3 · Mary · 2004/05/01

sshole

#4 · an anonymous coward · 2004/05/02

That last poster wasn't thinking quite right. I myself loved "Falling Down" and you look just like him. All you need to do is snap and you'd be the perfect Bill Foster.

#5 · Anonymous · 2004/05/03

#6 · Louis · 2004/05/10

The Clubman glasses were actually copied from the Ronsir frames made by Shuron, still available in loads of sizes and colors. Check out shuron.com.

#7 · Louis · 2004/05/10